Valentine’s day….Cupids day, a commercial day, invented by people, probably to sell more stuff and make money. So officially we don’t care about it that much, but since for me, love is my biggest love, it’s hard to completely ignore it. And even if you do choose to ignore it, there is always advertisements, billboards, radio, tv, social media, stores, magazines etc to unwantingly remind you. Nice maybe when you are feeling the love, but what if you just went through a breakup, or you are just reminded on that day, you miss having a partner, or it triggers rejection feelings, or there is another reason this day makes you feel like shit.
This day can be a huge trigger. While the world is (in your thoughts) celebrating their love, their romantic relationship, getting love letters or cards, receiving flowers, getting presents, breakfast in bed, surprise afternoon sex, sweet dinners, you are reminded you have none of that. Instead you feel more alone, disappointed in love, heartbroken, disappointed in your partner for not thinking of you, or maybe this day makes you realize your relationship is not what it should be.
So here is a shout out to all the people not feeling the love in this moment, on this day. Believe me, I have been there, you are not alone! And in this moment, I feel a lot of love for everybody going through a difficult time.
My own love life is transforming, I am letting go of the old. Let’s say, I am not expecting any flowers today. Today I am having a love affair with myself and I feel good and alive. But I have not forgotten about the many times I have felt lonely, disappointed, heartbroken, betrayed, forgotten etc. Today I make space for all of that lives inside of me.
So here is my V day survival kit. Maybe some things resonate, maybe some do not, but if you are feeling blue, I highly recommend, picking a few things and just trying it out.
- I would first suggest, to be OK, with not being OK.
- Have a massive cry, give yourself that moment, to let your heart cry.
- Have an extended self pleasure moment, oil your whole body, make love to yourself, have an orgasm or two. Remind yourself how incredibly lovable you are.
- Call somebody you care about, a family member, friend, maybe show them appreciation of just have a nice conversation.
- Write yourself or your partner or your future partner a love letter.
- Go to a yoga, meditation or breathing class (or do one at home).
- Get yourself flowers, your favorites!
You might think, spoiling myself? I am tired of me being the one doing that, and not anyone else. Or crying? I will never stop. OK, I hear you, but just stop the sabotage, what’s the worst that can happen anyway. Maybe your heart will open today, for yourself, and therefor, for the world. Find the love in yourself today, a little seed or a big plant, whatever is working for you. Because you rock! Im sure of it.
